Do straight transmen have straight privilege?

***
Do straight transmen have straight privilege?
***

considering privilege is created by society and given whether one asks for it or not. of course, being perceived as a straight male would grant them privilege.
-maxwellstirling

Those that pass more than those that don’t- even then, they still have to be careful in order to pass and be treated as a heterosexual cis gender man, so they don’t have complete straight privilege.
-lunar-mudby

Yeah, if they pass at least.
-just-a-mail-man

I don’t think so. My husband and I are “straight” (though we ID as queer); but are treated like our relationship is less less meaningful than a cis hetero couple.
-caseyreneelopez

Sometimes I mean me and my girlfriend don’t get cat called but I don’t take her to family dinners either.
-xanderthepander

'privilege'

'privilege'
***
Hard to see where the ‘privilege’ lies in being born into a body that does not match your gender. It is like a suffocation that can last for decades. The fact that some transmen get anxiety over this on top of transition, which can be an utter agonising wait in itself, makes me deeply sad and angry.
***

Big hugs to you all. Knowing Anxiety as I do it’s not something I’d wish on anyone.
-redrosewitch

I am binding unsafely

***
I am binding unsafely because my family doesnt support me being trans

I know it’s terrible to bind unsafely but I just am having really bad dysforia recently and it sucks
***

Yo–stop.
What are you doing? Why are you justifying putting your life and health in danger? Wear a sports bra or two if it’s that bad, but you’re honestly just flat out being irresponsible.

Sorry for not sugar coating it but it needs to be said. You wouldn’t let your friend get away with “I know it’s awful to drink and drive all the time but I’m having such a hard time right now and don’t want other people to drive my car”. So why are you doing that to yourself?
-greymatters

Being gay and trans is sometimes hard

***
Being gay and trans is sometimes hard BC ppl ask why you didn’t stay a girl if you like guys. What’s even harder is not knowing if you’re bisexual or just gay. I said I was bi for a while but idk if that was just cause i felt like a guy so I thought I had to like girls too.
***

Same. I’ve been asked flat out many times by family/friends “are you a lesbian? are you bi?” and it would honestly be easier to just come out as one of those than to explain my complex gender/sexuality. It would make people get off my back and be like “oh, yeah, that’s it. That’s why she dresses and acts that way that way” and i’m not offended, being a lesbian and being bi are fine when that’s what you are. I’m not, and it’s so hard.
-graduallyme

Why hate on stealth?

***
I don’t understand why there is so much hate in the community for those who choose to be stealth? I worked so hard for this, paid a lot of money, to be who I am today. What is the point of all that if I have to keep telling people I was once a girl?
***

Some of us have to be stealth in some areas of our life just to have a job, and can be out in others.
-theocraticjello



There’s some jealousy to it, because a lot of people wish they could pass but can’t.

There’s also people who take issue with the idea that we need to conform to society’s ideals and that “passing” is over-emphasized. There is certainly value in this perspective - the idea that passing is the most important part of transition, while true for some, is not true for others and should not be touted as the ideal.

-hungryego



I think the point is being a good Samaritan. If we deny who were are, we erase those who transition is not complete or not as physically successful. By shrinking into the crowd we become part of the crowd and we all know that mindset.

You don’t have to walk around with a bubble over your head, but you don’t have to flat deny it or avoid participating in conversations where your trans identity has real bearing. Being proud of who you are now helps other trans people by making us normal.

-girlandtheghost

Transman who is attracted to lesbians?

***
I have just come out as trans to everyone and now I feel like I have no identity. Being a lesbian is all I’ve ever known and now I am terrified that I am going to be viewed as straight. I am not attracted to straight girls, I am attracted to queer girls, but yet I know I want to be male. What does this make me? What am I? I am so confused right now.
-ghost
***

Dear Ghost, I considered myself a pretty proud lesbian since middle school, and I met this wonderful person online who later came out to me as transgender. I loved this person so much I decided to stick with them, and now a year later this wonderful man and I are engaged and I identify as queer pansexual. Love comes in all forms and just because you find a lesbian or queer woman to date does not mean she will see you anything less than a man, take my word for it :)
-Ineffable

Will I still be attracted to girls after taking T?

It's taken me a while to accept that I'm most likely FTM transgender and I just want to be certain.. I'm 17 and seeing a therapist who thinks it would make absolute sense for me to be trans and it sounds right y'know? Any time someone calls me "sir" it's like a rush, but if I get "ma'am" then it's incredibly frustrating... I want to buy a binder but I don't have any way to. I want to go on T but my girlfriend is afraid it'll change my sexuality.

Can someone tell me honestly that if I'm attracted to girls now, that I'll still be attracted to girls after testosterone? If not then is there a reason?

-Eli

Will transitioning warp my tattoos??

I have two sleeves, my back is nearly covered, my ribs on one side, some on my thighs, and one on my hip

My mom wants grandchildren

My mom has been nagging a lot about how she wants grandchildren. She knows I am transgender and has sort of accepted it, but she keeps talking about it, like she expects me to deliver her wish. I understand it would make her happy, but I really can’t. I am super uncomfortable about periods, vaginal penetration, in fact, every female function my body has. Let alone becoming pregnant or give birth. I have much respect for transmen who decide to carry their own children, but it is absolutely not for me. The idea of it freaks and stresses me out. It fucking sucks and I feel super guilty. 

All my life I've been told that I don't matter

I've been told countless times that my problems don't matter because I'm a white transguy. It's driven me to some very dark and often suicidal moments. (Don't worry, I do have help.) I get this from the trans community. I support awareness for all trans people, but whenever I'm told that my problems matter less than every other trans' issues, it drives me to not care and to hate people, which then makes me extremely sad. I'm not that kind of person but I feel driven to it by fellow trans people. 

 I've been told I don't matter all my life, and now everyone around me (those that I support) are also telling me I don't matter. Everyone tells me this. I'm told I'm not special as a trans person (because I'm white, not PoC) and I'm told I'm not discriminated against (b/c I'm white and b/c I'm a guy, not woman). I feel like I have no allies in my community, even though I support all trans people.