KIK?

I hear you guys have a KIK group, and I was wondering, is there a process in joining? I'm a bit socially anxious so I just want to make sure.

Confused

I don't have much dysphoria I feel okay in this body but would feel as a great upgrade to have a guy's body understand? Also I look in the mirror and see a person and they look beautiful they kinda are me but I don't feel anything I don't know why I feel un valid and have been doubting myself for a while I'm so confused

I want to be proud, but...

I'm one of those guys who wants to be super proud of being trans and very open about it esp since I dont pass 50% of the time but at the same time, I'm scared of the responses I get like how "I'm not a real man" "you're fake" "you can't be a man if you dont have the right chromosomes/a penis!" they make me ashamed of myself

"You got called Sir!"

So, I work at McDonald's, and get misgendered a lot, though it's only by the customers, but my coworkers are cool af. Anyway I do a lot of presenting (basically calling out numbers and giving food) so I have a lot of people contact. And the other day, I saw a trans dude, and I made sure to call him 'Sir' after I gave him his food, and he walked away with the biggest smile and his friend elbowed him and was like "You got called Sir! See?" So that was cool, because I could make someone happy

Neither depressed nor dysphoric

No matter how much I want hormones and top surgery and to be read as male I sometimes wonder if I'm trans enough. I don't get terrible dysphoria. I've always been a tomboy and I wanted to be a boy when I was a kid but I'm in my mid-twenties and I only just started to think about being trans and transitioning and the idea makes so much sense to me and it's exciting but I've never been depressed about my gender or seen a stranger when I look in the mirror. Are there other transmen who can relate?

I'm not their aunt

I don’t know how to explain to my nieces that I am their uncle and not their auntie. It doesn’t help that their dad is one of the most close-minded people I’ve ever met, and “corrects” me when he hears me introduce myself as Mark.

Dad changed his mind

My dad said he supported me last week and yesterday asked that no one call me he or my chosen name in front of him. Its too hard on him. I want to run away, he was the last person in my family I thought would do this to me. Now I am lost.

Why can't I just be born right?

I seriously wish everyone was just born into the right body it’s so aggravating the taunting and teasing the stress the dysphoria the depression the everything is so stressful!!! I don’t understand why our brains and chromosomes can’t connect with each other before were born :(

Too late for blockers?

I wanna get puberty blocker but I think it would be to late I'm 13 and I already have my breasts an period so I don't think those will be irreversible But I do think maybe it would stop my growth until I'm on T so maybe I could grow taller Sadly I can't get them because I'm still in the closet and doubting myself

"Supportive"

I’ve recently come out to my parents as trans, and they believe it is a phase. But, they did say they would be supportive. I asked if they could call me by the name I prefer and use he/him pronouns but they absolutely refuse. How are you being supportive if you don’t try to help me be as comfortable as possible? Sometimes I wish I didn’t come out. Then it wouldn’t hurt as much.

I want to be free..

I love God, why would he make this body a prison instead of my temple? How am I suppose to live if I cannot stand being in this tiny, sick and foreign body? This woman's body that does not belong to me that has proven it hates me just as equally. Why is it war? I envy strangers walking around and yes, they might have problems but at least their bodies belong to them. All I want is my body to be MY body. Not this. There are times when I want to claw myself apart, so that I might finally be free.

I'm ready to be free

Finally asking people to refer to me with male pronouns. Only took 22 years. But I didn't have anyone to talk to about this until now. Glad I'm able to start truly expressing myself and being happy with knowing who I am.

bottom tech

I'm a top bi guy and when i cyber with my boyfriend, we describe everything like I have equipment I actually don't. While in the moment it doesn't bother me because it feels right, and he tells me he doesn't have trouble getting in the moment with me as far as pretending goes, but after the fact I just get this crushing dysphoria when I think about how I'll never really be anything BUT pretending. I wish technology for bottom surgery were improving faster because I don't think i can do this.

Too macho

I can't relate to other transmen. They have too much of a connection with being female. I gave always and will always be 100% male. And even then I'm too macho for the trans community.

Chest visualisation technique

Sometimes I take off my binder, put whatever shirt I was wearing back on, and close my eyes, imagining how I looked flat and feeling nothing but the shirt on my chest. Sometimes it makes me cry. But I know I'll get top surgery someday...

Easy way "out"

I sometimes wish I was accidentally outed to my parents (who likely wouldn't believe it, but wouldn't hate me).

My girlfriend

My girlfriend is the best thing that's ever happened to me she always makes me feel like the manliest man in the world. She's the only person that fully respects who I am. without her I probably would of gone insane.

More FtM posts

I always see MtF trans posts on my dashboard. Don’t get me wrong, that’s great. I just wish there were more posts about FtM trans people.

If you want to talk

If you want to talk, I'm here. <3 Be strong.

http://itsjustalittlemonster.tumblr.com/

Hormones......?

I really want to go on T but i have so many fears about it. Like what if I’m even more unhappy with my voice when it changes? What if my hips don’t get narrower? What if my face still looks round and adolescent? Yet despite that I don’t think I could start University as i am now. I cant meet new people with this face, this body.  

Parents

I told my parents and they laughed

my fav person is trans?

my date and i have been together since february and only right fucking now i discovered about her/his confusion about gender identity, and i just feel like a terrible person ‘cause i dont know how to help. i dont know what to do to make my person feel better. or if i should talk about it. i dont fucking know what to do to help, but god, my favorite person needs me and i’m a mess with that stuff.

getting worse

I've been contemplating for the past few years. Lately, it's been getting worse. I need to talk to someone, but my voice is making me disphoric and I don't think my parents will understand me. Sometimes, I hate being Trans.

intersex?

I’m not sure if this is how I should send these in… But here is my confession…
I feel like something is wrong with me. I just want to be normal. Sometimes I wish I could just go back to being a girl and everything would be better. I know it wouldn’t. The worst part is I identify as a trans male but I feel that I should have been born intersex. I don’t feel bigender, that doesn’t fit me. I feel like if I found out I was born intersex then everything would make sense.

— drakeb137

Dissertation on LGBT issues

I am a Doctoral Nurse Practitioner student from South Florida. I’m beginning my researching for my dissertation on LGBT issues within the health care system, specifically on transgender health and making health care more accessible to the community. What biases have you faced, what road blocks have you faced, what can I do to make it it better? I would love to learn about your experience. f you are interested in participating in my research, while remaining anonymous, please message me, thanks!

http://pineapplefetus.tumblr.com/

Am I or am I not?

I’m 19 and I’ll be stuck with my extremely homophobic/transphobic parents for 2 more years so this limits the ways in which I can explore my gender expression. I think that I am trans and that when I get out of here I want to cut off my hair, get a mastectomy and maybe go on T. But I’m afraid of telling my friends because I don’t know if I’m 100% sure I’m trans. I realized that maybe I am a boy when I learned than being trans isn’t just “being born in the wrong body”. I got really excited when I went through others transitions. I don’t think this is a phase and I think that maybe I’m just scared of facing this reality. 

I don't get it

So I'm really wondering why some trans guys when they get on T and have been on it for long enough to always pass, just suddenly start acting like they're better then you because you haven't transitioned as far medically as they have? Why put me down because my face is round and I got small shoulders? Yeah I'm 5"2' doesn't make me any less of a man... Like we all grew up the wrong gender, we're going through the same. I don't get it?

Still a feminist

The worst fucking thing is being stealth and then having a self righteous feminist dismiss me because I've never had to go through what women do. Yes I did, for 24 years I did. I was a feminist then and I am a feminist now. And I can't say a thing because I can't out myself, but I know that even if I did, my experience would still be invalid. I WISH I'd never had to battle sexism, trust me, (that's why I still fight it) and I'm not trying to speak FOR you. But some men DO get it. Personally.

For Eli:

Hey i just started following you and im a trans man myself, recently out, so i know it may be scary, but im referring to the post about your sexuality changing after you take T, it doesnt affect it whatsoever, sexuality, is not affected by gender.

My moms a Christian

My moms a Christian and doesn't know I'm trans and I'll probably hide it for all of my life because of that

I don't belong in this body, or in any other

(NSFW, cw masturbation mention, phantom penis, breasts discussion, packing)

---

It’s probably something people say a lot, especially those of us here. But for me, I don’t understand top dysphoria because I don’t feel like I have a chest. I forget I have breasts. I literally do not realize they are there, they might as well be gone. I don’t know if it’s because of a physical nerve trauma I had as a child but I have almost no sensation in my breasts. I am a D cup but more often than not I am surprised when they get in my way. When I do bind (with sports bras because the fam doesn’t support… any of this which is partly my fault) the only relief is that they aren’t in the mirror and that they aren’t in the way. I don’t want to cut them off because to me they’re already gone. Even in a female/revealing swimsuit I don’t feel them. I feel my pecs, the muscles in my chest, not the flesh attached that hangs down.

But what I do feel, and it comes and goes, more strongly some days than others, sometimes I can go a whole day and it doesn’t cross my mind, is the bottom. I suppose if I analyze it, I don’t notice that I have female anatomy–I think I accepted a long time ago that I was born biologically female but that it didn’t feel right–but I do feel an intense lack of something. I feel crazy when I say it, but I would swear I have a penis and testes, the whole nine yards. Not “in addition to” having my female anatomy, it’s a non-entity in my mind, even when I pleasure myself, I can feel the reaction of what is my non-existent penis to stimuli and I can’t reconcile that with my logical mind. When I am acutely aware that my pants aren’t tight enough, that there’s a dip in the crotch, I adjust my position to try and make more room to try and make it so I can almost envision the packer I have hiding in my trunk under my bed taking the place of the feeling that I have that has no physical form. It’s always there though, in the back of my mind even if it’s not as strong as it has been other days.

When I pack, at home, in the wee hours while playing video games unable to hide my female voice to my dismay and having had too many medical issues to even consider hormones (I don’t react well to female hormones–birth control–I’d hate to see what happens on T) and had too many non-transition related surgeries to ever consider getting any (let alone finding a surgeon I trusted), it’s the closest I feel to being me.

I wish my voice was deeper, I wish I possessed male bottom anatomy, and I honestly wish that my breasts either had feeling so I could have an opinion on them or just go away, but I don’t feel like becoming a man would actually solve that. I was born biologically female. I don’t feel biologically female though, but I never would feel biologically male either. I don’t belong in my body, and I don’t know if I belong in any other.