transmasculine eccentric part-time transvestite

I am surprisingly feminine for a FTM. A transmasculine eccentric part-time transvestite. This means I am not afraid to rock makeup, and on my most confident days, I might even wear a skirt. However, most of the time I prefer being a delicate, feminine man. Any clothing tips? I would highly appreciate those that make me look highly androgynous.

no one will like me

I am afraid few men will like me because of my lack of penis. I wish I could have all those affairs I always dreamt of but all these vaginaphobia in the gay community is terrifying. I mostly dislike my breasts and cunt. I want to hit on gay guys but they only see a girl. It is killing me.

Virgin gay bar visit

Any tips for a FTM for his first time going to a gay bar? If other transman could give me some advice by asking in this page, that would help me too.

need help

I recently made the connection that I am, indeed, a trans boy. I have looked online for binders and stuff, but then I realized that if I get a chest binder I will most likely have to come out to my mom and she constantly reminds me that I’m a girl more than once a day. If I get a binder, she will definitely notice, like “hey where’d your boobs go?” so I guess I could only bind for like one day a week. I could also say that the normal chest binders are like sports bras or something. I just need help with this badly, I can’t even imagine coming out to my mom.

never properly admitted

Hey, I've never properly admitted I'm a transman, I've tried to tell my partner and she just has said she can't love me if I am. I just lie and say I'm not. I've sort of told my mum and she was good about it, but asked did I really want to go through all the surgery. I keep feeling worse and worse about the whole thing. I wish I had known when I was younger. I feel I'm too scared to do anything now as I don't want to be rejected and end up with no one.

Just wanted to tell you that

you are a wonderful person & you worth it! Never give up, stay strong! Have a nice day! .x :)

Relationships

relationships are so hard to maintain for me because I’m so insecure about being trans. I push away any boy or girl that tries to talk to me romantically because I’m afraid if I tell them I’m trans and I love them that they will leave me for it.

Closeted transition

I’m starting T this week, but I’m not out to my friends and family. I don’t think I have the courage to come out. I’m so fucked.

My dad is a twat

I came out to my parents at a gloat(asatru thing) and when we for in the car to to home they said they ‘understood’ and baisically said that i was a lesbian. Not fucking true. Later my dad used my fear against me and made me say that I was following a stupid trend, but I’m not. Now he constantly refers to me as his 'little girl’ but my mom had occasionally called me a he and gotten me mens shoes and clothes. I am NEVER going to trust my dad ever again. My mom will be getting the respect age deserved. My dads stupid actions along with the teasing throughout my life, which had caused significant psychological damage THANK YOU VERY MUCH YOU TWAT, will NEVER allow him to earn my trust ever again. He needs to accept the part of me that he never knew he had, instead of clinging on to the mask I wore to hide my pain before I realized that I was a man.

Transition blog

Just started my transition blog. I would love for people to follow, support, etc while I’m on my journey! :) http://becomingjackattack.tumblr.com

Sports bras not doing it for you?

Hi friends!
If you’re ftm or nb, but have rather large pectorals you’d like to hide, and sports bras aren’t doing it for you? Especially under t-shirts or other clingy shirts? And you can’t get a binder due to home and/or medical reasons? /have I got a thing for you/.

/dance tops/. I was in ballet and jazz and tap for a while, as was my mom, and those things are designed to keep you flat and still. Things sports bras are not designed for. Sports bras are designed to support /up/ and keep pain from movement to a minimum. Meaning that most sports bras actually push in and up instead of in and out. A dance top, however, is designed to squish in, like a binder except not as strong and stiff. It’s basically a perfect blend between a sports bra and a binder, and because it was designed for dancers (not an easy sport, I tell you), it’s super easy to breathe in and you can exercise in it. It’s easier to breathe for all you asthmatics out there, and it’s super comfy and easy to move in.

They look like the pics above (I’m a 34 C and I included what size I have and what brand), and I suggest a higher neckline (a lower neckline might show through your shirt, while a higher one hugs up against your collarbone). I also suggest a light color like grey so it can go under white shirts (I wore this under a white t-shirt and it didn’t show at all).

Hope I was a help to all my brothers!

chest dysphoria

my chest dysphoria is getting so bad. I can't take it anymore. I'm not a legal adult quite yet and my parents are not supportive one bit. but every day my chest dysphoria gets more and more unbearable. I don't know what to do.

I feel fake

Mostly because I can’t seem to get used to people calling me by my new name- and only seem to respond to my old. Its super embarrasing but I don’t know how to fix it.

STP reviews?

Question!!!! Does anyone know of some good websites/products for getting an STP? Honestly it would be awesome to get a 3 in one but whatever. I've looked at both FreeTom and Peecock but I was wondering if anyone has any reviews they could share or other places to direct a dude. Thanks bros! much love

be gentle

Abused by another TransMan

I am a TransMan and I was emotionally, psychologically and sexually abused by another TransMan. I feel shame for allowing this to happen. But I know now abuse is abuse doesn’t matter how it’s done. and it’s not the survivors fault.

Testosterone, KT tape, binders

http://www.gofundme.com/24yagnbp if you could share this link for my boyfriend it would be greatly appreciated. Thank you SO much.

Hot or not?

I am a closeted trans guy and I feel very dysphoric about my body, but when I look in the mirror I don't hate my body. I think it's hot. But I don't see it as my own. It makes me feel very confused

binded too long

I think I binded to long and I think I hurt my ribs

Confession from an insecure trans boy

When I wake up in the morning, I usually Skype my friends. This morning, I forgot to put on my binder, and I had obviously visible breasts. Seeing this, my friend decided that I was over the whole “trans” thing, so he kept calling me by my birth name and by female pronouns. It fucking sucked, and I felt like shit. It’s been 4 hours, and I still can’t get over it.

want to live as a cis guy

i have an unsupportive family and i can never tell if my doubts about wanting to start testosterone or even being ftm come from their denial or not. im always so worried and i desperately want to live as a cis guy in the future. nothing about me feels connected with being trans guy or being a girl (not that theyre synonymous or similar in any way), and i believe its internalized transphobia, but i just feel more valid calling myself cis. idk. i just wish some part of me was normal

☹️️

I’m a “non-passing” kinda fem gay trans guy and I feel like no gay guy will be attracted to me. I’ve seen other trans guys date trans guys but they date the ones who “pass” from what I’ve seen and then cis guys want guys who “pass” or other cis guys. I just feel like no one will ever want me TBH. I feel like no mlm will ever be attracted to me :(

Surgery for One

It’s my process, it’s my journey and giving myself the shots was quite the adjustment, its almost effortless now. Despite wanting to end the dysphoria, can I really do it alone? I’m kind of tired doing it alone but I’ll continue anyways, I just get scared & uneasy. I accept however I must go thru it but I’d be lying if I said I didn’t wish I had a hand to hold

I'm scared

I’ve come out of the closet to my parents and some others, but I’m scared that I’m “not trans enough” just because I like to wear dresses some days. I’m scared of starting T, because it’s something I want, but i don’t know what people will think, or if I’ll regret the decision in a couple years.

I’m scared.

of privilege & guilt

I'm a 16(17 in a month & 1/2) year old freshman, no one knows I'm transgender except the staff and a small handful of students. I have parents who use my name and pronouns, for two years I've been nothing but me. I'm privileged. I feel guilty.

Destroyed from binding

i have destroyed my back from binding. i have constant, severe pain even when i'm not binding, but i can't take a break because i have to work to pay rent and for my hormones. i can't afford top surgery but i need it so bad. my dysphoria is as debilitating as my back pain. i don't know what to do.

Clothes, binders and sexual misfortune.

Confession: Some days I feel so pretty I want to wear a cute skirt and crop Top yet still wear a binder. I still am a boy even though I like “girly” clothing it’s just the general public says I can’t be a boy when I want to sometimes wear cute or sexy ‘girly’ clothing.

Binders: I’ve had this crappy cheap loose side clasped binder for about a year now and I’m finally waiting patiently for a new binder in the mail from gc2b should arrive in 3 or so weeks~❤

Misfortune: I don’t know my sexuality 100% but I’m generally mostly attractive to men and I’ve had sex with my *hoo-ha* but I’ve always wanted to try anal but recently I had to have an iliostomy (close to 3months ago) and got my whole colon removed so it may be dangerous for me to have anal with my lover so I’ve just got to accept that. I also have an issue with people calling me a girl because I like having sex with my born genetals and do not plan to get bottom surgery. :/

make it through

I don’t know if I’ll make it through a week. I don’t know if I’ll make it through this day.

Loving myself with her help

My girlfriend Rose always makes me feel good about my body.. sometimes i feel bad that i feel better than usual but.. i love her. She makes me so happy. She helps me feel content with my parts. Hell, she makes me proud of my body. I love her and im really glad that i met her. Shes a gift, and im glad i met her

Body positivity

Some days i feel really good about myself and some days i dont, on the good days i take a picture. Like after i get out of the shower or with nothing but underwear on, i want to post them because i am proud that i can manage to even have good days (im pre surgery) but im afraid of what people are going to say or think. I also think its important to show that not all transmen are what the media portray, like i have a slightly feminine figure and i dont have surgery but thats also what a transman looks like, i want to advocate that with my body but i am slightly afraid.

Shattered

After five years of love and a growing and carefully built relationship and loving together for 3 years, my partner left me in a rush in paragraphs while I was at work- just for the plan to be to run away whenever they felt like jumping ship. Giving up on not only us, our home, but also giving up on me. I feel like my transition is the reason. If not part of the reason. That it’s changed me. That it’s pushed her away. And even if she says it isn’t, there is always that fear. The shittiest part is I have no room to complain. I’ve been on testosterone for a little over 2 years, I’ve got a decent job, my family and friends have been loving and supportive of not only them running away from me but also as I’ve transitioned. I’m still a college student, I’ve got a fat happy cat and a big loving German shepherd. But I’m miserable. It’s been a month and it feel like centuries. I just want to be happy; wake up excited to start a new day, to get support and love from my myself, to figure out what’s best for me and my transitioning. But I don’t know what makes me happy without them. I don’t know what to do without them - food isn’t appealing, cooking bores me, sleep is frequent short panic bursts, nightmares keep me in a horrible mindset, my insomnia has come back in full force, I’m smiling and faking my way through my day when I literally can’t look myself in the mirror. I miss them. I want them to come home. I have put my heart on my sleeve and they don’t even want to try. I just want someone, anyone to talk to. My days are filled with silence. I would love to talk to and get to know other trans kids, non binary, queer, cis, whatever. I just don’t do well on my own and I can’t handle having nobody as a friend in my life. They were my everything and it’s gone. /endrant

From Atlanta, looking for friends

Hey there! Alex here; FTM and been on T for about 2ish years now, working on legally changing my name/sadly pre-op and from Atlanta looking for other trans men and LGBTQA+ people to get to know and talk to. Shoot me a message if you'd like a new friend on this blog or my transition blog; anupliftedevolution (tumblr)