single for life

I'm a ftm straight guy. I have been single for almost 2 years after a 4 year relationship. It hasn't bothered me very much but the last couple of months it has. Its frustrating living in small town Kansas sometimes. Everyone knows about my Transition but no "straight" girl or lesbian will want to date me. It gets lonely sometimes. 

-g2sweet18

'privilege'

Hard to see where the 'privilege' lies in being born into a body that does not match your gender. It is like a suffocation that can last for decades. The fact that some transmen get anxiety over this on top of transition, which can be an utter agonising wait in itself, makes me deeply sad and angry.

questioning again

not sure if this even counts as a transman confession, but here we go: I’m questioning my sex and gender, again… is female masculinity “enough” for me? and what about this body? damn… butch/genderqueer/trans… what will it be?

-cosmicdancer

coming out twice

When I was fifteen I tried to start transitioning but very few people around me were supportive and I was focusing too much on how other people saw me, so after a while it just got too hard and I gave up. Now I'm in a more supportive environment but I don't want to go through coming out again and the process seems really daunting.

you define gender, not others

Nothing defines your gender but the way you identify. Aesthetic tastes and preferences shouldn't be gendered in the first place ( and I think everyone, regardless of gender, can agree that eyeliner and florals are awesome :) ) If anyone tries to delegitimize you as a person due to something petty like that, then that's their problem, not yours 

i'm strong & lucky

Strugglin wit dysphoria rlly kills. Even wit my mom not accepting me for who I am & puttin me down I kno Im strong enough 2 go thro this journey & Im so lucky to have my gf K'leigh by my side. Love my life, who I am & no one will change that 

-Jesse 

feeling dysphoric around pre-T trans guys

I have had a hard time relating to other pre T trans guys I have met lately. All the other guys i have met are very into make up and dressing in girl’s clothes. I honestly feel dysphoric around these guys because I have spent so long trying to avoid any thing that labels me as female.  I feel like other people will hate me if I stated my feelings about this. I mean, do what you want, I’m just having issues finding guys I relate to and don’t trigger my dysphoria. 

-ironben

trans christians?

Please tell me there are other devout Christians who are trans? I cant be the only one struggling with my faith and who i am.

lesbian dating a transman?

A lesbian friend started to date a trans guy and it honestly bothers me. She strongly hangs to her lesbian identity and constantly talks about helping him get on T. She also whines about how there are always a lot of straight girlfriends of transmen. i have never said anything to her about it. I really don’t want her to be a “I only date women and trans men.” type. I find it to be extremly transphobic to both men and women. 

-ironben

i don't want to go to the ER

I want to stay anonymous because I'm embarrassed... I had sex with an idiot yesterday who clearly doesn't get much vag let alone FTM vag ... anyways because i wasn't very lubricated down there and he tore my skin ... better known as vaginal laceration ... I don't want to go to the ER for obvious reasons and don't know what you really do ... has this happened to anybody? What did you do?

i feel like i'm a disgrace :(

guys i need support i feel like something is wrong with me. i feel like a waste of a "girl" i'm nothing anyone wanted or expected me to be. I annoy people because i get frustrated when people don't call me "he" or "mason" because i was born female and as gabby. I hate it. i hate it so much. i hate my voice i hate hearing how feminine i am. I'm worried and i fear this is a phase but i feel like its not but h*ll if i know. I'm a lot happier but i'm making people around me feel awkward 

I'm trying to be tough i'm trying to be a man. i mean if i want to be a man so badly why am i taking this so hard.? I was so pretty and people tell me how i should go back to being girl because of how hot and pretty I was. I wasn't confident as i am now back when i was feminine and when people tell me that it makes me so insecure. I just feel like i'm a disgrace. 

-mason   

all i want to do is flee

I know the person I like has no problems with me being a transgender. But I myself do have a problem with it, in the sense that I am so afraid I will be pushed into a female role again as soon as I have sexual intercourse with my “lady parts”. I know gender is not just between your legs, but for me it apparently is. Every time someone shows interest in me, all I want to do is flee.  

-mrsparklebutt

gender roles are fucking stupid

When I start my transition and I am able to grow a nice sized beard, and after I get my tattoos. I’m going to wear a dress and paint my nails and go out into public to show that gender roles are fucking stupid but I am a man and can do what I want. 

-blackeyes22

won't be taken seriously

Since I'm already in a relationship with a man, I feel like once I start to transition, I won't be taken seriously, and that my partner will end up turning around and saying he can't handle it.    

decluttering identity

I got rid of a lot of stuff. Clothing, accessories and pictures of me from about age 12 to age 20. Gifts I received for my birthday or Christmas that somehow reminds me of my “female role” I felt I was playing for so long. Birthday cards or letters that describe how nice of a girl I was. Drawings I made, crafts I made.

All those memories are suffocating. I literally really need space to figure things out. 

-mrsparklebutt

doesn't rain, it pours

Between a hard breakup and quasi-accepting my trans identity (guess which one caused the other!) I’ve been a f**king mess.

So I suppose I’m lucky that my work called to say “we want to keep you, but you have to take some personal time until you get your shit together. Your job will be here when you get back”.

Except no, because I can’t afford to not be working.

Doesn’t rain, it pours.

-ekobor

i'm a transman who is attracted to lesbians

I have just come out as trans to everyone and now I feel like I have no identity. Being a lesbian is all I’ve ever known and now I am terrified that I am going to be viewed as straight. I am not attracted to straight girls, I am attracted to queer girls, but yet I know I want to be male. What does this make me? What am I? I am so confused right now.

-ghost

possible to be trans and popular?

Is it possible to be a popular person in your conventional singaporean society/friend circle while being a transman? Has anyone managed to do so/maintain their popularity?

[Singapore]