Can't stop hearing it

My girlfriend called my junk a cooter one time over a year ago and she apologized and we both cried for an hour or so. Now we’ve stopped having sex and every time i try to get something going i hear her saying it over and over and i can’t push back the feeling that she doesn’t really see me as a man and the further i get into my transition the more it feels like she isn’t attracted to me and just resents me for bringing her into my struggle. I thought she was going to leave me the other day. That lead to some really bad thoughts.