Malaysian FtM looking to start HRT

Im a 22 year old malaysian FTM looking for hormone therapy a.k.a testosterone shots to finally start my transition. Excited and frightened at the same time.

Considering singapore as it is the nearest option for me. Any suggestions as to where can I obtain them? Thanks in advance.

Small shirts?

Anyone has any idea where to get a good fitting short sleeve shirt for a small-sized ftm? For CNY, budget $25. Thanks!

Afraid of losing sensation down there

3 years on T and 2 years since top surgery. I want to get bottom but am a bit afraid of losing sensation down there.. anyhows, hit me up if you want to make friends or chat or meet up. Am thinking of gathering us few awesome unique people to maybe go for coffee and chat. transbrosg@gmail.com

Nervous about my future

I'm super scared about my future.

I've been struggling so much with my gender identity, ever since I was 12, actually. Lately, I'm figuring that I may be a very feminine transman, as I enjoy makeup and things considered to be feminine, but I really want to be a man. But the more I think about my future, the more I fear for it. Mainly, I'm moving to a new house, my dads got a girlfriend who has four kids, and they may be moving in with us soon. While my stepmom isn't entirely homophobic/transphobic, my dad is 100% against LGBT. I'm just so scared on how I'll come out to him; will he accept me, or reject me? What will my stepmom and siblings think? I'm just so nervous and scared.

An apple with blue paint

When I told my mom about this "transgender stuff" I didn't expected much but I hoped something would change, that she would try to help, but this change didn't last a week.
I think she wouldn't mind if it was really it but she kinda hope it's not, I also feel like she's holding on to the fact that I paint my nails and like wearing necklaces.
It gets me on the nerves cause it's JUST clothing! I mean, if you paint an apple with blue paint, it's still an apple!
I guess I'm just disapointed, cause I thought I could lean more on her.

Dysphoric sadness from dressing male models

I volunteered to help a friend out for an important local fashion show as a dresser (someone who dresses the models before they walk), and thought I'd be OK helping male and female models get dressed. I ended up dressing 3 guys, and ended up getting very self-conscious about not only my chest, but also my weight. They were all lean with straight bodies, while compared to mine it's all curves and varying thicknesses. The clothes I helped dress them in lay perfectly on them and I wished really hard those clothes could lie like that on my own body (I get really bad envy of FTM's who don't have such noticeable curves like mine). I wanted to leave at that moment because I felt the wave of dysphoric sadness rush over me... I stuck around though, because it was my friend after all, but it still weighs heavily on my mind.

Garagesale for FtMs?

Is there a community in SG that is something like ftm garagesale where people can buy/trade/sell ftm related items, or simply share feedback on whats their experience like buying/shipping/wearing the items as a singaporean? Reviews on youtube are cool but its always nicer to have some from a locals perspective (: or to share exorbitant shipping fees with. Heh. 

i think i'm bi

I’m afraid to tell my fiance that I think I’m bi, and I want to have a threesome with another ftm or cisgender male. She’s already had fears that I might turn out gay, but I love having sex with her. I just think some guys are so sexy.

life is really unfair

//vent time//
i’m a 14 y/o transboy who lately came out to his mom who…is really transphobic. she wont let me even get a haircut or buy a new sports bra to flatten my chest a bit. my dysphoria is there 24/7 and i cant do anything about it. she makes me feel so gross for “wanting to be a guy”. i hate it.
i knew i was trans for about a year, i was questioning my gender since i went to primary school.

…meanwhile there is another transboy who imidiatelly after realising he was trans (about 1 months ago) he came out to his parents and they turned out to be really supportive. i tried to ignore it until…he got a top surgery. A TOP SURGERY. a 16,000zł (zł is a polish currency) (i live in poland tbh) top surgery. THEY MANAGED TO GET HIM A TOP SURGERY IN 2 MONTHS DONE BY ONE OF THE TWO SURGEONS IN POLAND THAT ACTUALLY SPECIALISE IN THAT.

so yeah i’m really fuccing done with my life and dysphoria is making me unable to function properly, i would give anything just to get a 5$ binder from amazon (tbh i dont care if it will break my ribs and kill me, if it will flatten my chest i’m getting it and i’m wearing the shit out if that), i dont care anymore about my health, i harmed myself before many times, why not do it again jUST TO GET RID OF THE DYSPHORIA PLEASE SOMEBODY TAKE IT AWAY FROM ME

i know so many people have it worse than me. i’m sorry.

//end of vent time//

transmasculine eccentric part-time transvestite

I am surprisingly feminine for a FTM. A transmasculine eccentric part-time transvestite. This means I am not afraid to rock makeup, and on my most confident days, I might even wear a skirt. However, most of the time I prefer being a delicate, feminine man. Any clothing tips? I would highly appreciate those that make me look highly androgynous.